He sat staring through the chain link fence, the passage of time fly past him as
he did so. For three long years, everyday in the same place, he sat there watching.
Carl watched the lanes, but not just all the lanes. He watched the second one in
from the kerb, the supposed slow lane, as he did everyday, counting the vehicles and itemising each into groups of cars, vans
and four wheel drives, trucks and buses.
And whilst he sat there, he also practised. The same routine, but each day the exercises
attained new and better results, achieved hitherto unreachable heights. The key to all this was his inimitable patience. Patience
he had plenty of time was not a problem. If it was going to take forever, it would, such was Carls mindset.
Yet still the traffic flowed. Such is the ritualistic vigour of the human race, precision
machines, driven by near precision drivers, at the same precise speed. The four lane motorway was the epitome of modern man.
It was also Carls fixation. And sitting as he did within 3 metres of that continual traffic flow, he couldnt be nothing but
fixated. Such was his demeanour these days that fixation was a pastime worth contemplating forever.
Suddenly, the tempo of the traffic changed in front of him. The peak was beginning
to ebb and the make up of the flow was changing too. Less cars and four wheel drives, less buses, but steadily increasing
flows of vans and trucks, the commercial daily grind of business taking over from the mad rush of the worker ants rushing
off to work. Carl noticed the change instinctively, hardly reacting to it. He knew it happened but anyone else watching would
not have even seen the change. But he knew. After three years of studying it, he knew.
Now it was time for him to put into practice all he had trained for, to bring to
bear the fruits of his patient labours. All the precise calculations were set in his mind, the heights, the speeds, the distances
between moving vehicles. Now was time to test his honed skill. He looked up from his deep contemplation and spied the exact
point of his action. The second lane was now thinning as commercial traffic used the two faster outer lanes. There were the
normal cars filled with people on vacation negotiating the motorway for the first time, the elderly safe in the knowledge
that this lane was the safest for them, and the younger drivers feeling their way in life. Occasionally, a commercial van
would whiz on through, beating the faster traffic that was going too slow for its liking. Even 13.3 vehicles to be precise,
thought Carl. Even more rarely, a laden lorry or lightly populated bus would pass by, every 28.9 vehicles.
It was time, for sure. He scaled the fence, taking care with each step, as his size
thirteen feet were not adept at the small holes. Carefully manoeuvring his way up the 5-metre edifice, he marvelled at the
change in perspective of the target zone, mindful of both his current situation, and the objective situation he was destined
for. Any one looking at his 1.9 metre frame would have admired his strength and flexibility, and the panther-like grace he
displayed in his physical endeavours. They would have if they had seen him, but no one could see him. Even if they did, he
thought to himself, would they really care to notice? The world had changed too much in the past three years since the change.
Carl leaped flowingly down the other side of the fence, landing as softly as a prowling
leopard on the course grit. He wasnt worried if he made too much noise, the motorway traffic would drown it out anyway. But
the soft landing allowed him to tune his muscles to what lay ahead so the movement was appreciated in his own mind. Feeling
better for the action, he turned and faced his objective.
There were no doubts now, no time for second thoughts. He was as prepared as he would
ever be. He closed his eyes tight shut, took a deep breath, felt for the heartbeat of the traffic, and stepped out into the
first lane, pacing methodically and accurately into the second lane, measuring off two and one half steps into the lane, then
he turned towards the oncoming traffic and opened his eyes. Just in time to see a small two door coupe driven by an ageing
blond coming towards him 5 metres away.
With little effort, he leaped into the air, the car careening under him a full metre
bellow at the apogee of his leap. He landed softly, as he had trained himself, in time to take a breath before the next vehicle
approached. Once again he leapt into the air, and once again he cleared it by a handsome margin. Carl was starting to feel
more at ease with his mission now, knowing that cars were no problems.
Pretty soon, in fact the fifteenth vehicle since entering the traffic flow, a van
came towards him, his first real test. He had to hope that the vehicle would be averaging 90kmh to ensure the manoeuvre would
succeed. He had trained for a margin of error of plus or minus 10kmh, and his agility was primed primarily for the 80 100kmh
range. Any slower and hed no doubt be clipped by the back of the vehicle on the way down, and any faster the vehicle would
collect him on the way up. The chance of this happening was 1 in 3000 so his preparation had been full. But still, the opportunity
for failure existed. As did the anomaly of trailers and other towed vehicles. Caravans were no problem, he could land on them,
run their length, and jump off, he was sure of that, but small undetectable trailers were a concern.
However, if anyone had observed his leap off the fence, they may have noticed a slight
deceleration of his leap at about one third of the way down. Carl was prepared. He knew it.
The van, a 1965 VW Kombi chugged along towards him, the big circle with the VW monogram
on the front growing bigger by the second. Carl estimated it to be travelling at 60kmh, so it didnt come as a surprise that
the music the driver was listening to, reached Carl well before the van did. In fact, the strains of Alice Coopers "I Love
The Dead" boomed eerily towards him, and suddenly the driver sped up as if to run Carl over deliberately. Unfazed, in fact
thankful, Carl began his leap, attaining his apogee well clear of the sure cruise microbus, the drivers intonation of "Great
Leap Man" bellowing out over Alice Cooper, as Carl floated back to the tarmac behind it, in its smoggy residue.
He continued this all morning, the only other close call coming from a small utility
vehicle towing a trailer sailer, Carl barely missing the following mast. But the time was now nearing, the time of his objective.
The large Scania 18 wheeler would be roaring down the lane very soon, the second truck this morning to use this lane. But
this wasnt going to be another leap of faith. This was the objective Carl had been both training for, and waiting for, all
these years. His thoughts were only once disrupted when a cyclist, bearing heavy panniers and signs of a long distance traveller,
including the obligatory "Jesus Loves You" sticker on the back pannier, yelled out to him, "God Loves ya man" and carried
on his merry way.
Then he saw it. He looked down at the scratch marks on hardtop where his motorbike
had been dragged along motorway, the point of impact. He leapt instinctively over another two cars before the moment of truth
arrived. The Scania. The driver was mindlessly in control of his vehicle still, as he always had been when he observed him
in the past years. The cigarette, or sometimes a joint, dangling between his lips. The wan, vicious smile permanently in position.
Boy, was Carl ever ready. The truck approached, steadily rumbling along in the slow lane as it always did, at a sedate 120kmh.
The large flat frontage still bore the scars of his motorbikes last rites. His pride
and joy Harley Fat Boy had borne the brunt of that ugly truck. But he was going to get even, attain retribution. Not only
for himself, but for all the others who travelled the slow lane who had suffered the ravages of this maniacs wrath and lawlessness.
The time was nigh. Carl leapt, but not high enough this time, and sailed through
the windshield, landing abruptly on the front seat adjacent the driver. The windshield was intact. Carl knew it would be.
The driver didnt realise that Carl was sitting next to him. Carl knew this would be as well. But he had time. And he had the
The obnoxious creature driving the truck lit up another smoke, a joint no less. Perfect
thought Carl. The smoke had no effect on Carl, but the driver became a little less positive in the control of his truck. Carl
looked at the manifesto on the clipboard next to him, and noticed that he was hauling a consignment of Kawasaki motorcycles.
Thankfully, Carl didnt like them, but how apt it was this guy was hauling motorbikes.
The truck soon overtook the cyclist, the driver leaning heavily on the horn as he
whizzed by as close as he could get without hitting the cyclist, but close enough for the slipstream from the rig to blow
him into the side gutter of the road. The VW Kombi also received the same treatment, the hippie carelessly chucking a finger
at the passing beast. Soon the traffic thinned, and truck gathered speed, wobbling unsteadily as the marijuana took hold of
the hapless idiot. Carl saw the chance, and as another Fatboy streaked past, Carl turned to the driver, coughed at him, grabbing
the drivers attention for the first time.
But he stared dumbly into empty space. Suddenly, his features turned ashen, as Carl
guided his hand into the morons body and grabbed his heart. He started squeezing, the affect on the driver instantaneous.
The squeal of pain shattered the windscreen as the truck veered off the road and drove headlong into the ditch, disintegrating
into oblivion as its 130kmh catapult forced the back of the trailer through the front of the truck, dismembering the driver
in doing so.
Carl sat behind the fence contemplating the now near deserted highway. The truck
still steamed in front of him. It had been easier than he thought it would have been. A vehicle pulled over, the Kombi, the
stereo spilling the sounds of Roger Waters Every Strangers Eyes across the landscape. The bearded driver climbed out and surveyed
the carnage. As he was checking out the remnants of the cab, the cyclist pulled up, and did the same thing. They exchanged
pleasantries then both turned and approached Carl.
"Hey" crooned the hippie "nice job. How does it feel?"
"Yeah, how does it feel?" echoed the cyclist.
Carl looked at both of them. He didnt trust his own voice since it hadnt been used
for three years.
The two spectators were still looking at him questionably.
"I feel much better, thank you" replied Carl "but how can you see me, Im a spirit"
"Man, you dont get it" laughed the hippie, "we share your spiritualism."
"Yep," said the cyclist, "and now at least you can rest in peace. God loves you and
so do all those he terrorised."
"Thanks, but what do I do now, now that it is over?" asked Carl uncertainly.
"Youre a free spirit, man, do Gods will."